Friday, July 17, 2009

Uncertain Projections

            Focused. Writing a business plan. Not much time to write.
            Michelle and I took a long walk yesterday evening, down by the coastline. Let the baby sleep in her stroller and enjoyed the gorgeous sunset. Discussed the business options ahead. Michelle asked, “What is your heart telling you?”
            “Good question,” I answered. After humming and hawing, I said, “I think I need to throw my all into this thing, at least in the short-term. And we’ll see. I need to meet with these legal and accounting guys next week to get a better sense of what I could really stand to gain from it. And I need to write a proper business plan so we can make projections.”
            She nodded quietly. In some ways, it didn’t matter what I said to her. She would support me. But in other ways, I know she was visualizing what this would mean. Long days away from the family. Travelling and distance. Stress and exhaustion. I’m sure she was taking it all in quietly as we took that stroll.
            It’s a funny thing. None of us really knows how long our lives in their current form will last. Our kids grow up. We lose our jobs. We have to move. Our environment changes. And yet, when we’re put in a place of having to make that kind of decision ourselves, it suddenly becomes a difficult discernment process. And it very much makes us cherish what we’ve got.
            I turned to her, with the sun glinting off her eyes and the ocean reflecting the sunset, and I kissed her. I may not know about our future, but I do know that I’ll always have her, and that’s the most important thing of all.

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